A Night At The Opera, or: The Truth About Foxwell Dropstar

It was a special night in Dudeland, because Foxwell Dropstar, the most famour opera singer around, was in town for a big performance. Foxwell was a born entertainer, and he was in full swing tonight, spinning those legs of his as though independent from his body, putting on a great show for the townsfolk who were having a fun-filled evening.

Nobody was having a better time than Princess Sophia, a huge fan of Foxwell Dropstar, but this didn't sit well with Sheriff George, who was in charge of security for the event and sure didn't like seeing Princess Sophia look at somebody else as her hero.

"Thank you, everyone, you've been a great audience," Foxwell called to his fans, as Sheriff George escorted him to his carriage after the event. "I have great news," he went back once again, just as Sheriff George was about to put him in the carriage, to soak up more applause. "I'm adding a new date to my near sell out tour. Tomorrow Night. For one night only. Foxwell Dropstar performs in Dudeland!" The crowd erupted with a cheer. Not since a few minutes ago had Foxwell Dropstar performed in Dudeland, and it was sure to be an exciting night.

So, the next night, they did it all over again. Foxwell spun those legs of his, Princess Sophia cheered, and Sheriff George stood idly by in case there were any problems, but only one problem presented itself, a real dilemma. Just as Foxwell was beginning his most popular number, which he'd dedicated to Princess Sophia, Sheriff George noticed that a plug had been left, well, unplugged. It was Foxwell Dropstar's mic - the sly devil was lip syncing, and must have been all along!

Sheriff George, as rarely occurs, was unsure what to do. Unmask Foxwell as a liar, and he'd be the toast of Dudeland once more, but the townsfolk would be devastated. Or, allow Foxwell Dropstar to keep up his charade, but how would he be able to live with himself?

After the show; Foxwell asked the entire town to stay for a party he had arranged for himself, and Sheriff George was beginning to think perhaps he had no place else to go.

"Ahoy hoy," Foxwell called to Sheriff George from across the room.

"Howdy. What can I do you for?" Sheriff George asked.

"Not a thing. I just wanted to thank you for the great security work you did the past couple of days friend," Foxwell said with a big smile, so as to show his perfect teeth.

Sheriff George had no idea how to respond and was a little disgusted at the sight, though he wasn't sure why.

"You'd consider us friends, right?" asked Foxwell. "You know it really means a lot to me to have friends like you. The life of a celebrity, it's a lonely place. I'm so pleased to have somebody like you. Somebody I can trust. Trust with everything. Do you catch my meaning?" Foxwell asked, staring deep in Sheriff George with his beady eyes.

"I think I do," Sheriff George said, not really sure, but desperate to put a stop to this painful exchange.

"Good, then you won't have any trouble not revealing my secret?" Foxwell said happily, finally breaking his eye contact with Sheriff George.

"How did you know that I know?" asked Sheriff George, truly perplexed.

"I guess you could ask how did you know, that I know you know?" quizzed Foxwell, clearly proud of himself.

"Well, you just told me," replied Sheriff George. "That's how I know"


"Potato Potato," Foxwell shrugged. "Anywho Sheriff, I'm gla we had this little chat. I hope you'll keep our little secret, under your hat." said Foxwell, contorting his stiff face with difficulty into a wink, leaving Sheriff George more unsure whether to reveal his big secret to the rest of Dudeland.

"Were you talking to Foxwell?" Princess Sophia asked excitedly as she came running over to Sheriff George. "He's so dreamy. I wish I could get a chance to talk to him."

"You didn't talk to him when you invited him to come perform here?" Sheriff George asked, a little puzzled.

"I thought you asked him to perform," Princess Sophia replied. The two exhanged looks, and their dual gaze settled on Foxwell Dropstar himself as he struggled to open a bottle of champage with his hairy paws, and climbed onto a podium.

"I think you will all be very excited to hear, that I am adding another date to my succesful tour. Tomorrow night I will be back here performing for all my fans in Dudeland, one more time!" The crowd erupted with a cheer, though noticeable less escited than the night before. The entire town was sleepy, and really just wanted some shut-eye. Sheriff George in particular was shocked, he needed to get back to work. He'd neglected his duties as Sheriff for the past week to head security, ever since Foxwell showed up days early, citing a need for prolonged preperation time. Who knows what depraved things could have been going on with him away distracted. It was at this moment he made a decision.

"Give it a rest Foxwell," Sheriff George called out, making his way to the podium. "Your act is grown about as tired as this town."

"Ah Sheriff George, come for an autograph?" Foxwell pulled a pen out from his pocket and began unsteadily scrawling on a lifesize poster of himself. "To Sheriff George, my biggest fan. Never give up on your dreams. You'll get there in the end. You old pal Foxy." The handwriting was illegible, but Sheriff George accepted it so as not to hurt his feelings more than he was about to with the next crushing blow.

"Admit it Foxwell. Tell everybody the truth. They deserve to know what you are," Foxwell Dropstar looked worried, about to be revealed as a fraud, and he knew it.

"Good Sheriff, how about a picture first?" he said, pulling Sheriff George by the neck in fron of a photographer. "One for the morning papers, and make sure it gets on the front page," Foxwell ordered the photographer, attempting a double whammy of toothy grin and painful wink, making all the ladies swoon, giddy with delight.

"Admit that you're a fraud, now," Sheriff George demanded. "You've misled everybody in my town, and heck I don't like anybody being misled. Them's grounds for capital punishment...You'll have to apologise."

Foxwell pulled nervously at his collar, unintentionally ripping it with his buffed claws as he looked at the faces of his many, many...many fans. Foxwell's lip began to quiver uncontrollably, and he fought to keep back the tears, making it look like his face was unfortunately swallowing itself.

"Sheriff George is right. I'm a fraud. I've deceived you all, and for that I'm sorry. The truth is. I'm not a human at all," he burst out, and the crowd gasped.

"Woah, woah, slow down there, that's not what I meant," Sheriff George tried to intervene, but it was too late, and Foxwell was in full flow now.

"I have undergone many, many, many hundreds of hours of surgery, to make myself more human. This fur, these claws, I just wanted to be rid of them. I just wanted to fit in. These legs. These incredibly gifted legs. They aren't truly mine. Surgery bought me these. And yes, the surgery worked even better than I expected. I could have gone on fooling you all for ever, but in the end I'd only be fooling myself. I'm ashamed."

For a moment there was silence, but slowly the murmuring started, things turned a little ugly, and the townsfolk turned their backs on the fox that had brought them so much joy in the last two nights. Even Princess Sophia, stunned as she was by the news, couldn't bear to look at Foxwell. The floodgates opened and that fox began to weep.

"I didn't mean..." Sheriff George started up, but stopped himself, looking first at the shocked and dismayed face of Princess Sophia, then at the departing former Foxwell Dropstar fans, and then the devastated fox beside him who'd suffered enough for one night. What purpose would it serve to reveal another of Foxwell's secrets?

"Now there's your front page," the journalist said, getting a snap of Foxwell, who couldn't do a thing, but howl in despair.

"Listen Foxwell, if your fans are true, then they'll accept you for who you are...whatever you are," Sheriff George reluctantly comforted, looking up and down the hairy pawed, buffed clawed, stiff faced, straight teethed thing standing in front of him.

"Maybe you're right," Foxwell said, looking up, his hair matted around what can only be described as a unique face. "Thank you. Perhaps now I can be honest with myself, as well as my fans."

And Foxwell Dropstar picked himself up, and with his legs slowly spinning behind him, walked away. That fox had regrets, that was plain to see. Mostly regrets about all the surgery he'd paid for, and Sheriff George couldn't help feeling he'd given Foxwell a bad case of buyer's remorse. There an't no feeling worse than that, and it just ate Sheriff George up inside.

It seemed unlikely the world would ever see Foxwell Dropstar again. Until the next day, when 'FOX, well?!' was the headline plastered all over the morning papers.

Apparantely Foxwell Dropstar had been one busy fox since his revelation, taking part in a tell all interview to reveal the disturbing facts of his true story, getting his career back on track, and better than ever in just one night. "Isn't Foxwell so brave," Princess Sophia said in passing, forgetting her feelings of horror from the previous night, as she read the interview over again. "You've got to admire him."

"You sure do," thought Sheriff George, and for once the thought of Foxwell Dropstar didn't make him sick to his stomach.

A Sheriff's Tale

It started out like any normal day in Dudeland for Princess Sophia. She got up, did her make-up and had her daily kick-boxing training, as well as looking through the many movie scripts she had been sent for film people wanted her to star in.

Yes it was a good life for Sophia, but it hadn't been such fun recently for Sheriff George in Fort Thought. For around 2 weeks now he had been forced to live with The Pimp and Reginald in Fort Thought. Every morning for the past 2 weeks the Sheriff had woke up to hear Reginald and The Pimp arguing about things like jewellery and women.

Whenever Sheriff George tried to sit as usual on the roof of Fort Thought and have some nice peace and quiet as he looks over Dudeland, he would be disturbed by The Pimp and Reginald. Things were becoming too much for Sheriff George.

This morning was just as usual for the Sheriff; he woke up, had breakfast, and headed up to the roof of Fort Though to look over Dudeland. As he sat down in his chair Dan came running over.

"Sheriff George, Captain Birdseye has pulled into the Dudeland Docks to unload his latest delivery of Fish Fingers. We need you to come and sign for them and make sure everything goes down smoothly" said Dan.

"Ok, I'll be down in a minute" said the Sheriff. He turned round and The Pimp and Reginald had been standing behind him watching them.

"Captain Birdseye!?" asked The Pimp. "Isn't he the meanest captain on the Seven Seas? I hear he rides a ship called the Black Pear and keeps little children locked up to row it for him." The Pimp said seeming very interested in the matter. "If it's the same Captain Birdseye, me and Reginald are coming with you to give that Captain a peace of our minds."

Sheriff George didn't seem too happy about hearing this but agreed to it. "Alright you can come with me, but don't touch the Captain. He won't bother you if you don't bother him."

So Sheriff George jumped off the roof of Fort Thought wicked Cowboy styley to land on his horse 'Old Hickory'. However, the horse wasn't there as The Pimp and Reginald were already on it.

"Cummon Sheriff, what are you doing on the ground?" asked The Pimp as the Sheriff picked himself up off the gound and brushed himself off. He picked up his hat and put it on but as he did it was snatched back off his head by Reginald who put it on his own head and he and The Pimp rode off towards the docks.

So without his horse the Sheriff had to walk to the docks, a good three mile walk to the edge of Dudeland. There he found The Pimp and Reginald had pinned Captain Birdseye to the ground and were telling him to free the children.

"Stop it!" shouted Sheriff George as he pulled The Pimp and Reginald off the Captain, and took back his hat from Reginald. "I'm sorry Captain. Where are the fish fingers?" asked Sheriff George.

"You think after that I would give you the fish fingers? Well you're sadly mistaken Sheriff!" screamed the Captain. He then cut a rope on his boat and a door swung open, and a bunch of kids came charging out and ran into Dudeland. "Dudeland will be ours!" said the Captain as he followed his minions into Dudeland.

Sheriff George looked at Reginald and The Pimp with an angry look on his face and began closing in on them as they backed up nervously.

"You just cost us hundreds and thousands of fish fingers" said Sheriff George.

"At least he freed the kids" said The Pimp desperately searching for a silver lining.

Just as it looked as though Sheriff George was gonna open up a can of whoopass on these two punks he heard a scream that sounded like it was coming from Princess Sophia. Sheriff George jumped onto Old Hickory and rode off in the direction of the scream.

He eventually found Princess Sophia on the back of her Unicorn 'Thunder Bolt' fending off all the kids as a maniacal Captain Birdseye stood on top of Fort Thought directing their attack on the Princess.

The Sheriff rode through the pack of kids and seeing that Sophia could handle herself against Captain Birdseye's peeps, he focused his attention on the Captain himself.

He rode through Fort Thought on the back of Old Hickory. (NB. Kinda like how Arnold Schwarzenegger rides a horse through a building in True Lies) and reached the top of Fort Thought where he battled it out with Captain Birdseye.

Suddenly the Captain whipped out a frozen Fish Finger and threw it at the Sheriff. Sheriff George caught it though and tossed it right back at Captain Birdseye.

"Nice Fish Finger, wouldn't you agree Sheriff George?" he said maniacally before throwing it back. With cat like reflexes Sheriff George caught it and threw it back. It hit Captain Birdseye in the head and as he stumbled backwards he fell over the edge of Fort Thought. The children turned their attention away from Sophia and gathered around their fallen leader. Sheriff George quickly lassoed them all with his rope and with them all tied p he threw them back in their boat at the docks and sent them away, after taking the Fish Fingers of course.

"We must hurry back to the Palace for our party" said Princess Sophia to Sheriff George.

"What party?" asked the Sheriff, confused.

"My election party" said Sophia. "I am running for President of the Universe again Trampy Lucy" she said, and they all rode back to the palace in a hurry to hear the results of the election.

After all the electoral votes had been counted it was all even, and one place was left to have its vote counted. Whoever was voted by that certain place would be president of the Universe. That place just happened to be...Dudeland. And of course the vote went to Princess Sophia by one vote.

In an interview with Trampy Lucy she said that it didn't matter that she hadn't won because she now had a lot on her plate anyway. She had just got a new job as a wedding planner, where she had a lot of great ideas for newspaper weddings, where everything down to the dress would be made of newspaper, as that is all she could afford.

Not only that, but she said she would be training for the Olympics. She was aiming to win the gold medal for Pot Noodle eating at the 2008 Olympics in Beijing, which she had to get ready for.

Back in Dudeland everybody was partying it up and Sheriff George was talking to Sophia about who could have made the last vote that gave her the one vote win in Dudeland.

"It was I" said an evil and creepy voice from the shadows. It was Johnny Total. "I made that vote because with Princess Sophia out ruling the universe, you Sheriff George will be all alone in charge of Dudeland and then I Johnny Total will over throw you and come ruler of Dudeland" he said as a he cackled.

"No you won't" said Sheriff George plain and simply.

"Oh" said Johnny Total. "Well this is awkward".

He then quietly sneaked back into the shadows and as Sheriff George began speaking to Princess Sophia again a flash of light came from the shadows where Johnny Total had gone and he came running out of the shadows and ran out of the door and into the night shouting the words "What a scoop".

But tonight wasn't a night for Sheriff George, or anybody for that matter, to chase the bad guys, tonight was a night for celebration. So people chowed down on the pile of Fish Fingers long into the night at the palace of Princess Sophia!

Rasta In The Box

As the sun began to shine on another splendid day in Dudeland, Sheriff George arose from his chair on the roof of Fort Thought upon the sound of trumpets in the distance. It was Princess Sophia back from her visit to the president in America.

Sophia was definitely shocked when she saw that Sheriff George had done what he said he would do and had covered all the desert type land with beautiful green grass. Sophia was thrilled and was ready to show Sheriff George just how thrilled.

But the Sheriff had more important things to do...like whip out his pistol because he saw that The Pimp had returned to Dudeland...WITH A NEW PIMPSTICK!

"What's up player?" quizzed The Pimp.

"I thought I told you to get lost" Sheriff George said gruffly.

"Easy now, easy now cracker, I didn't come here to hurt nobody, I was just in the neighbourhood and thought i'd pop in" The Pimp said.

All of a sudden a man jumped out of nowhere onto Sheriff George's back knocking him down.

"I would like to introduce my new associate Sheriff. He's a Rasta from Jamaica, man, his name is Reginald" The Pimp said as Sheriff George picked himself up off the floor.

"What up man?" said Reginald, in a very Rasta way to the Sheriff.

"Well, many aeroplanes are up" replied Sheriff George.

"Say what?" said the Pimp.

"I believe he say many aeroplanes are up, man" Reginald chimed in.

"You know Sheriff, dat ain't cool" The Pimp informed Sheriff George.

Princess Sophia then randomly chimed in; damn her and her random chiming in.

"When you were born did God paint you?" she asked The Pimp.

"Say what?!" said The Pimp surprised.

Sheriff George stepped in again. "Listen you...you...you..."

"Cummon Sheriff, say it" said The Pimp.

"You PIMP!" Sheriff George eventually got out.

"Sheriff, why you gotta be like that, man. I thought you and me were cool?" The Pimp said as he began to sob.

"Reginald, lets go, we're clearly not wanted" The Pimp said.

"Yes sir, safety" replied Reginald. They began to walk away, with her heads down looking for sympathy. Sheriff George wasn't buying it and he headed back into Fort Thought. However Sophia felt bad about all that had happened and ran after The Pimp and Reginaldn. As she got closer she could hear them talking.

"It's just a shame we got no place else to go" said The Pimp to Reginald.

"Wait" called Princess Sophia. "If you want you can stay in Dudeland."

"You serious?" said The Pimp.

"Defo' man" said Stuart from Big Brother 5.

"Stuart, I told you 'stay in your room or we kick you out of Dudeland', you damn hippy" called Sheriff George from Fort Thought.

"Anyway, you're welcome to stay with us as long as you want" said Sophia to The Pimp and Reginald.

"Ok, but under one condition" said The Pimp.

The next thing we know The Pimp and Reginald are moving their things into Fort Thought as a very disgruntled Sheriff George looks on.

"It's only for a little while" said Sophia to the Sheriff.

"Hey man, we are gonna be livin' together. It is going to be most excellent" said Reginald, as he moved some boxes in the Fort.

"If it gets too much for you, you can always come and stay with me" said Sophia to Sheriff George. However, the Sheriff's mind was elsewhere as he could hear faintly in the distance the dreaded words..."What a scoop."

Total Annihilation!

It was another bright and sunny day in Dudeland, and it was going to be a great day, for one reason in particular. Princess Sophia was of in America having dinner with the President, and although due to Sheriff George's new stadom he had been invited, he was forced to decline the invitation as he felt it was his duty to stay in Dudeland and protect it.

So Sheriff George sat soaking up the sunlight on the top of Fort Though, getting a tan and generally just relaxing, when there was a sudden flash of light.

Sheriff George bounced right up and looked around, drawing his pistols. But he didn't see anything. As he sat back down there was another flash of light and Sheriff George jumped up again, this time due to his fabulous hearing expected of the best cowboy there ever was, he was able to hear a faint voice saying "What a scoop."

Sheriff George looked around and eventually caught glimpse of someone's head poking over the wall, how exactly I'm not sure as Sheriff George was on the roof of Fort Though, which is 3 floors high.

Sheriff George walked over but by the time he reached the point where he had seen the persons head, they had gone. He looked round and saw another flash and again the words "What a scoop".

He walked over to where he could again see someone's head just above the wall, and he walked very slowly so and not to startle the stranger. He quickly picked up the pace, leaving the stranger with no time to run and caught him. He lifted him up on to the roof, and suddenly realised who it was. It was...JOHNNY TOTAL.

Johnny Total had been Sheriff George's archrival for years, known throughout the world as being the funniest and kindest cowboy there ever was. However, when Sheriff George arrived on the scene, Johnny Total had become threatened and had a funny turn. Eventually, having lost all his followers, he was left weak and was easily beaten by Sheriff George.

However, it appeared now that Johnny Total wasn't the cowboy he used to be, he appeared to be a photographer.

"What are yah doin' here, Total?" asked Sheriff George throwing him down on the hot tin roof.

"Word's been going around about the fact that you're famous now. And the public wanna see pictures of famous people. And so seeing as I'm the only person who knew where to find ya, I thought I'd do this service for the public." answered Johnny Total.

"Nobody, takes pictures of Sheriff George you hear" said Sheriff George. "Now take your camera and get out of here"

Sheriff George removed the roll of film from the camera but as he went to throw it away Johnny Total ran and grabbed it out of Sheriff George's hand and jumped off the roof of Fort Though and made a run for it.

Sheriff George joined him in jumping off the roof but landed on his trusty horse called Trusty. Trusty galloped after Johnny Total and with his lasso, Sheriff George was able to tie up Johnny Totals ankles and jumped on to his back to drag him to the floor.

"Hand over the film" said Sheriff George.

"Never!" cried Johnny Total as he put the film in his mouth and attempted to swallow it. That's right; he actually tried to eat plastic. Ewwww.

However, the film must have gone down the wrong way as Johnny Total began choking, and seeing as Sheriff George and Princess Sophia are the only inhabitants of Dudeland no doctor was around to help. Therefore with his last breath Johnny Total was able to get out the words, "What a scoop."

With Johnny Total now in a better place, Sheriff George walked back to Fort Thought; Trust must have run away.

However, unknown to Sheriff George Johnny Total opened his eyes and smiled as he took the film out of his mouth, and sprinted off to get the pictures developed.

Universal Sheriff

As the sun rose on another great day in Dudeland, Sheriff George the only remaining rootin' tootin' cowboy stepped out of the large gates of Fort Thought into the path of the blazing sun. He spat out the barley he had been chewing, kinda like you would see in a Wild West movie, and walked out to see how his amazingly super cool and super fast horse Apollo, also known as Scruffy, was doing.

"How you doin' there partner?" Scruffy said to Sheriff George. Oh My God talking horse, it's nuts!

Before the Sheriff could answer, the sublimely beautiful Princess Sophia came running over carrying her newly won Miss Universe trophy.

"Sheriff George!" she cried. "All the losers in the Miss Universe contest are after me, and they are rioting outside my castle!" she continued.

Upon hearing this Sheriff George let Scruffy out of his stable and did an amazing stunt to jump up on to the saddle of his horse, tootin' tootin' cowboy style. Sheriff George pulled Sophia onto the horse and together they rode off towards the rioting losers.

As the two of them got close to the rioting girls, the girls ran towards them to attack, attemtping to use their signs as weapons. However Sheriff George was quick thinking and smart and used his lasso to tie all the girls up. Every last one of them.

A man then came running over. It turned out to be the President of the Miss Universe competition. The man, who will be known as Eddie, as that is what it says on his name tag, began yelling. "What are you doing, you maniac, why have you tied up my girls. Why I oughta..."

"Now look, Eddie" Sheriff George cut him off. "This is my town, and a damn fine town it is, and I will be damned if anybody is gonna come in here and start taking it over, so get your girls and get out"

As Sheriff George walked away Eddie attacked him rom behind. Oh No!

But Sheriff George was quick to recover and threw a cactus at the unsuspecting President of the Miss Universe Competition. That's right he actually ripped a cactus out of the ground and threw it at the President of the Miss Universe competition.

"Oh god!" Eddie cried, as he tried to pick all the prickly things that comes off a cactus out of his skin. The pain became too unbearable and he began begging Sheriff George to shoot him and put him out of his misery.

However, Sheriff George just got back on his horse with Princess Sophia and rode back into Fort Though where they watched from up high the President of the Miss Universe Competition writhe in pain, and they laughed and laughed.

Pimpin' Ain't Easy

Having been given the position of Sheriff of Dudeland, the rootin' tootin' cowboy, who from this point on will be known as Sheriff George, sits high in his fort, watching over the quiet village that is Dudeland.

All of a sudden he spots a stranger riding his horse in the distance in the direction of his Fort. Sheriff George jumps down from the roof of his fort, landing perfectly on his horse, and sets out to meet the stranger on the border of Dudeland.

After riding a few hundred metres, Sheriff George catches a glimpse of the cowboy riding very close, so he waits...and waits...and waits...and waits, until the cowboy comes out of nowhere knocking Sheriff George off his horse.

The stranger begins to circle Sheriff George on his horse, before taking off his cowboy hat to reveal a whole head full of long flowing locks.

"I am...The Pimp" says the stranger, who is now no longer a stranger, as he has a name, and that name is...The Pimp. The Pimp is what he shall therefore be known as from this point forth; despite the fact that he's a one off character.

Sheriff George picks himself up and dusts himself off and The Pimp does a flashy evil cowboy style dismount; use your imaginations to figure out what it looks like. The two both, now on their feet, begin to circle each other, when suddenly Princess Sophia comes running over.

The Pimp quickly grabs her and whips out a gun which he puts to her head. OH MY GOD! Sheriff George whips out his pistol to meet The Pimp's and a stare down begins between the two and...

...the next morning Sheriff George awoke from his slumber and found that The Pimp, a Zorro looking character had still not yet left town.

"Leave varmint" said Sheriff George.

"No, I will be Sheriff of Dudeland" The Pimp came back.

"Well then I guess there's only one way to settle this isn't there" said Sheriff George.

"Yes, a showdown" The Pimp answered.

"Yes, a duel you could say" replied Sheriff George.

"A shootout" The Pimp came back.

"Very well then, let's do it" said Sheriff George.

Princess Sophia joined the two Rootin' Tootin' cowboys to start the duel on the eastern west side of Dudeland Park.

"Five paces on my count" said Sophia.

"One..." the men began to walk. "...Two..." the men walked a step further. "...Three..." the men kept walking. "...Four..." Just one more step to go and all involved were beginning to get worried, and perspire; all except Sheriff George that is. With his super calm coolness and snazzy cowboy hat, boots and vest he was never afraid of any duel that came his way. "...Five."

Blam, blam, blam, boom, Big Explosion, Piow, Piow, Wham, Kablamo, WHAT'S GOING ON, Kick, Punch, Thwack, Shazow, Batman style, Superman Style, Spiderman Style, Sheriff George style.

And the day was saved thanks to...Sheriff George.

"My hero" cried Princess Sophia.

"All in a days work as Sheriff George the Sheriff of Dudeland ma'am"

The two then laughed as they stared at the Pimp a bloody pile on the floor, and Sheriff George chewed his barley before returning to his fort to get some well earned shut eye.

The Sheriff Rides Into Town

Our story starts off on a glorious summer's morning. The sun was just dawning on yet another wonderful day in Dudeland.

Princess Sophia of Dudeland had just risen and opened her window to look at the sunrise. As she watched, she saw the shadow of a horse galloping under the sun in her direction; you know how they do in old western films.

She quickly got dressed, throwing on her overalls and ran down the vast stairs to the front door to meet the stranger.

After watching the stranger get slowly closer and closer towards her, she felt the excitement beginning to build.

"Who could it be?" she said.

Eventually the horse drew closer and the stranger on the horse turned out to be a cowboy, and he did a huge cowboy style stunt to get off his horse; you know the kind they do on old Western films - like 'Back To The Future: Part III'.

The cowbody took off his hat, and introduced himself as George, the most rootin' tootin' cowboy in the whole universe.

"Allow me to introduce myself, I am George, the most rootin' tootin' cowboy in the whole universe, and I request to be your wonderful Dudeland sheriff ma'am," said the rootin' tootin' cowboy.

Sophia thought about it long and hard and decided to interview him for the job. She asked him what kind of experience he had doing Sheriff-type things.

"What kind of experience do you have doing Sheriff-type things?"

"I built a fort in the Rickmansworth School 6th Form common room" said the rootin' tootin' cowboy.

"I put so much thought into that fort that I decided to call it Fort Thought"

"Wow" exclaimed Sophia. "I am so impressed, you're hired!"

"Cool beanios!" said the rootin' tootin' cowboy, who will now be known as...Sheriff George!